First dream is up! We're officially go...
To start us off, here is a doozy.
did you ever see the movie Splash? the 80’s one about the mermaid? do you remember when, towards the end, scientists were after the mermaid, and they caught the human guy she loved and had put him in a tank—-to see if maybe he was a merman or something too? well, they had him in this giant aquarium-looking tank, hooked up to monitors and the like.
and in the beginning of this dream, that’s what was going on with my daughter. she was in a big aquarium-tank full of water, and apparently under scientific observation. maybe I was even the scientist, but I’m not sure, it changed too much. obviously she was the subject of some kind of experiment, and they were watching her to see what would happen.
during the course of the dream…. my daughter wove a cocoon around herself. I swear. I’ve never dreamt anything like that before. (the closest I’ve come is dreaming that I was being wrapped up like a mummy in order, so said the dream, to get a good night’s sleep!) it was a regular fuzzy buggy looking cocoon. and we all eagerly awaited the moment she’d emerge, to see the transformation that had taken place.
now one might think that, obviously, she would emerge as a beautiful butterfly. and everyone would oooh and aaaah and she’d be so colorful and delightful. but, this is my daughter we’re talking about here. that would be entirely too silly as far as she’s concerned. I don’t think she has the slightest regard for butterflies (although we all know that she likes to pet bees). (in fact we might have predicted she’d emerge as a dinosaur. :D) no, no, my daughter emerged from the cocoon as—- a baby hippo.
yep. the cutest darn baby hippo I’ve ever seen, but, a baby hippo.
maybe you see why I was so very disturbed by this dream. in the dream, mind you, I was not upset about anything. it all made sense in the dream. but when I woke up, I thought, what in the world? (and be prepared for me to sound very nerdy about this; I do enjoy being analytical and nerdy, you know ;) )
well… I thought… the kids’ favorite animal at the zoo is the hippo. the exhibit is such that you see the hippos from underwater, as if in a big tank. and one hippo (the one the kids really like) is such a ham. for such an enormous creature (on average, they’re 11 feet long, 5 feet tall, and can weigh up to 7,000 lbs), he is a graceful being, always showing off his underwater ballet. he twists, he turns, he comes up out of the water a bit, he moves along the tank wall, following people as they walk by, and then does the same thing but upside down… he is obviously loving all the attention. he is a powerful and glorious beast, and all the people who come to see him are his subjects and admirers. far from being sad about living in an enclosure, he is definitely in control of his life, his environment, and the people around him, and he’s perfectly happy to boot. the only time you might see him sulk is when other animals are getting more attention, which sometimes prompts him to come out of the water and lie in the sun… and then people are quite shocked and amazed to see ALL of the hippo—-which is quite impressive indeed! he is 7,000 lbs. and his teeth are as big around and as long as my arm! for a grass-eater, esp, this is something worthy of consideration. keep in mind, they are used to, at most, only seeing his Eyes or Nose above water, if anything at all.
so, in the first part of the dream, my daughter is in a tank, in a lab, being watched as if a scientific specimen. which is very much in line with her being autistic and people writ large tending to regard her as an object of scientific concern instead of a fellow being. it’s always about data and forms and checksheets. she might as well be in a tank hooked up to monitors, like the beginning of the dream. in the end, of the dream, though, she is a baby hippo—- destined to one day RULE that tank, and in no way upset by being observed, no, far from it… she is a graceful, glorious creature, and we are all her willing subjects. she knows she is powerful, has absolutely no qualms or self-confidence issues; she knows that we can’t help but admire her and be in awe. that’s one way I’ve come to interpret the dream: my daughter is going to be just fine, no matter what other people’s expectations of her are. she has her own life with her own experiences and she is very likely NOT going to fulfill anybody else’s ideas of what she should be (she’s not going to emerge as a butterfly after all), but she’ll be what she is happy and natural being (a cute little hippo). she does not need other people to validate her, because the people who see her for who she is will find her to be an amazing person, and to heck with the rest. literally speaking, a hippo’s skin weighs a ton, it is 4cm thick, bullet-proof and accounts for 25% of their weight. no snarky little comments directed her way are EVER going to get through to my daughter. they will bounce off and hit somebody else in the eye, maybe, but my daughter will be completely nonplussed (always has been, always will).
and in case we ever forget who we’re dealing with, or underestimate her, she’ll come out of the water and let us see her in the full light of day, where we can’t blame anything on distortions due to water.
this is the second way I’ve come to interpret the dream: most of the time she is underwater—-in short, she has far far more potential and ability than she usually lets people see. and she does use her potential and ability, but in ways that are not easily/ readily recognized or noticed by others. but, again keep in mind, when she DOES come out of the water, it’s usually only to sleep in the sun. she STILL is not showing us all her potential. a hippo, with all that tonnage, can still run faster (sprinting) than a human on land—- from 18-30 mph. and a hippo can bite a crocodile in half with its jaws. they are amazing creatures to be dealt with very very respectfully, and yet you might never guess one could even STAND on land, until it came after you :D . and my daughter, she has this marvelous potential (not to bite a crocodile in half of course, but I mean mental potential), and yet she will never show it to you unless she absolutely has to. which makes sense; hippos don’t typically go to extremes unless they are feeling very threatened, and my daughter is the same way.
the third way I’ve come to interpret the dream is this: water is usually symbollic of the subconscious or of the emotional realm, in dreams. my daughter is in a water-filled tank, therefore she’s submerged in the emotional reality of the world. but. hippos don’t swim. they can’t in the least bit swim. they only walk along the bottom (of the tank, river, etc), and then push against the bottom to rise towards the top. they can float, but they can’t swim. most creatures of the water DO swim. fish, turtles, salamanders, even ducks or otters… you’d think, if it spends so much time in the water; it could swim. but hippos don’t. the one at the zoo, with all his graceful ballet, doesn’t swim. he achieves his motion by pushing against the tank walls and the bottom of the pool, mostly. and yet! you really should see him. people are always taken aback when told that he can’t swim. you’d never know. he could fool anyone. and, you start thinking, does it matter that he doesn’t swim, when he moves so gracefully anyway? and I’d say, no, it doesn’t matter at all. they get around just fine. it’s different, but it works. and, my daughter, submerged in the emotional reality of the world, doesn’t “swim” either. she doesn’t navigate the social and emotional world in the same way as all the other creatures of the social world. but it really doesn’t matter. her way is different, but it’s beautiful, and it still works. in fact, if you’re not careful, it will fool you all across the board.
Copyright 2009 Amy Howell. All rights reserved.
